There, on the heavenly crossroads, he stood with his head down as his body trembled, tears and sweat dripped from his face like rainfall. The man in the shadow behind his back nudged him and growled, he looked up to the path that winded uphill towards the light and he saw her standing in the pathway. She was beaming with delight, wearing a white cloak and a white headscarf that glowed like first light.

He looked desolate and he could hardly give her a pale smile wiping his tears off. She paused, worry replaced delight on her face, and then she ran towards him.  The man in the shadow stepped forward hiding his face from the light, and lifted his hand to stop her midway. She screamed as she stopped, “what happened, what’s wrong?” The man in the shadow growled once again.

Devastated, she looked at him, tears floated in her eyes as she asked, “Tell me, what’s wrong?”

He looked at the man in the shadow from the corner of his eyes, and spoke in a shaky whisper, “it’s alright, sweetheart, don’t worry”.

She shook her head, almost crying, and said, “You’re lying, tell me what happened, why he is taking you down there?”

He responded, “That’s what I really am, that’s what I deserve, that’s what I always deserved”.

She cried loudly and said, “That’s not true, I saw how you suffered for so long, I saw how you sacrificed; you are a good man, and I love you.”

The man in the shadow growled again, and spoke in a deep loud voice, “Madam, haven’t you just seen he lied to you, he is shit scared” he chuckled, “and he is yet to see his new home and only then he would truly know a fear he can never escape”.

He whispered again, “Please don’t tell her that, let her be happy”.

She screamed at the man in the shadow, “So what if he lied to me? I know he is not a bad person”, and then said to him, “why don’t you just ask for forgiveness? He forgave me for everything”.

He replied still trembling feverishly, “I tried honey; I tried so much when I was alive, but He never responded, and He is right, I must pay for everything, I deserve this.”

She said as she cried like a baby, “No please, please beg Him for me, beg Him now and let’s go up there!!”

He looked up slightly to the lit path, and bowed his head down again and replied, “It’s too late for that now, sweetheart, but I am happy for you, you made it there”, he paused to wipe his sweat off his face, “I remember that night in the hospital, you were so scared if you’ll make it there, I am so glad you did”.

The man in the shadow growled again, “That’s enough” and pushed him forward to start walking on the path downhill.

She screamed again, “Why don’t you just beg Him for forgiveness? Please don’t be such an idiot”.

He replied shakily again, “It’s my destiny, I was always cursed sweetheart, no matter what I did; I never made anyone happy, and Him; not the least” he wiped his tears again “but it’s alright, it’s enough for me that you made it there” and started walking slowly.

He heard her voice echoing behind him, “You are such an idiot, I am so angry at you”.

He nodded and whispered, “You are right, I am, but I love you; I always did” and kept walking to the fiery chasm down below.

photo credit: dsearls 2010_07_17_paris_catacombs_018 via photopin (license)