Things I Still Want Her to Know

Two weeks have gone by and I still cannot believe you are gone. One and a half-year ago, there were many things I wanted you to know; things I wished I had done differently and things I wished I had told you. Just a year ago, things were so very different. Just a month ago, although the doctors had been telling me otherwise, I didn’t want to believe you were going. I know you respected my eccentric nature and still loved me, but I never desired to be so alone as you have left me to be now. I didn’t want you to respect my weaknesses so much. Continue reading “Things I Still Want Her to Know”

Cancer Care in Pakistan

Terri Clark, the Canadian musician, once said when she saw her mother suffer and die from cancer in 2010:

“When someone has cancer, the whole family and everyone who loves them does, too.”

Today, I can completely relate and understand what she meant. I cannot just empathise with her pain, I know that pain.  Continue reading “Cancer Care in Pakistan”

The Conquest of Paradise

I have always believed I had a purpose. Ever since I was a little child I used to ask myself often “Why did God create me?”, “What if I didn’t want to be born?”, “What if I wanted a different family?” I have been so far unable to find the answer. I have hardly ever been convinced by what philosophers or clergy has to say about it. After years of search for an answer, I have managed to shut myself up on the concept that human life exists on a delicate balance between predestination and free will. Continue reading “The Conquest of Paradise”

Compassion and Humanity

I wonder how so many people walk over this earth without any compassion or humanity in their hearts. How we believe that we are so strong, so powerful, and so clever to be able to do anything. How we treat our fellow beings so unfairly and unkindly, so rude and mean to them, and cheat and lie to them oblivious to our own frailty. Continue reading “Compassion and Humanity”

Things I Want Her to Know

She calls this room my “hujrah” (cloister / man-cave).

This is my operational room. This is where I monitored the entire 2013 elections, and in the words of my cousin Sidra, “as a one-man army”. This is where I read, I write, I cozy up in to my lonely self and spend time thinking, smoking, taking tea or coffee, use internet, go “social”, do multimedia of all types depending on my mood and just be with myself – most of the time just sit and do nothing. Continue reading “Things I Want Her to Know”

The Tree of Life

When I originally watched Darren Aronofsky’s The Fountain back in 2006, except for its magical music, I did not really like the movie. The non-linear narrative always confused me and seemed irreconcilable and incoherent for my little brain. The sporadic cuts and flashbacks were not just the only reason I did not quite liked the movie, as a dutiful devout Muslim, I felt really appalled for its Semitic references; the tree of life and the obvious connection to Genesis and Kaballah.   Continue reading “The Tree of Life”